I'm sorry to say Randy lost the battle today. I talked to the doctor at 4:30 and they had increase his pain meds today, and given him Haldol to relax him. They said he was much more comfortable today and the doctor thought it would be about a week. Then at 5:15 I got a call to come to the hospital because his blood pressure had dropped. I was there in 10 minutes and he was already gone. He was still warm though so I held his hand and stroked his head and balled my eyes out for an hour. Because we were trying to keep his hopes up, we didn't discuss "what if . . . . ." while he was lucid. So much of the time he wasn't lucid or just sleeping all the time.
I guess while we all want to think about a good outcome, it would be helpful, for the caregivers, if one hour during those long months of treatment, was spent discussing "what if . . . ." and what you would like done.
I know after awhile this sounds redundant and lame, but thank you for the support you have given me all these months. I think I would have lost it without your help.
