The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society - Fighting Blood Cancers
11 Replies Latest reply: Feb 26, 2012 11:08 PM by Emandre RSS

Did anyone move during or after treatment?

AmazingGraceMom Registered Users
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Did anyone move to get rid of the memories or because they were afraid their house caused their Childs cancer, or any other reason?

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    Brandi2020 Registered Users
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    My husband and I did and I think my family thought I had just plain lost it when I told them we were selling and moving just a couple miles down the road.  We did this about a year after our daughter started LTM. It was a combination of things though.  Our first house was a project, and we knew that when we bought it.  After her diagnosis it was just exhausting to think of what else needed to be done.  It was fun at first to change everything to our taste, but it was just too much after learning she had cancer. I was also concerned about what might be lurking after discovering mold when we tore out the first bathroom.  That was before her diagnosis, thank goodness. She was in the hospital with pneumonia (one of a few times) when I snapped and decided I wanted to move. The biggest thing for me was starting over.   We had stresses before her cancer diagnosis and the diagnosis amplified things.  We decided a fresh start that included a new home was in order.  Honestly, I am so much happier now also.  I don't know why, but I do feel we have started over and the other house held too many memories I didn't want to think about anymore.  I hope I don't sound too crazy   My daughter is now closing in on eight months OT and doing well.

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    Ingridktw Registered Users
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    We moved one month into LTM from North Carolina to California.  The reason was simply to be closer to family.  With another little guy in the house and my husband traveling for work, I dreaded the thought of leaving him with friends if my CK had to be inpatient - he was only 3 at the time and was not into sleeping away from home.  With family it has been much easier.  Somehow, the actual move was great - I flew with the kids and my husband and a friend drove the truck and the cars.  Packing was a nightmare - it was a year ago and I still don't know where most of my stuff is...  We left pretty quickly without much planning.

     

    I did find it hard to move hospitals, though.  The transition wasn't easy and I've never felt like we've been totally integrated into our current hospital's system...

     

    Ingrid

    • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
      Emandre Registered Users
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      Hi,

      My 4 year old daughter was diagnosed with ALL pre b last summer.  She flew through consolidation and is in maintenance now.  We also have a 10 year old son and 8 year old daughter.  We also have done this with no family living in this state.  My husband and I really like Denver and his sister and her family live there.  We think we would really

      Ike to be near family especially going through this life change.  We live in Ohio, 25 minutes from cincinnati children's hospital (#5 in the country for oncology). It's such a big decision to make a move from here.  Help.  I am torn.  Since my daughter isn't as high risk, is it ok to think about, or are we crazy to make that change/move?

      Thanks,

      Val

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    balkan123 Registered Users
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    Good discussion...........Even I think of moving a little far after selling my present house/changing school for kid...... just to get rid of these Cancer memories for myself and kid.......We would have to wait for 1-2 yrs as just started LTM !!

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    Shakinquaker Registered Users
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    There have been plenty of folks who moved with and without issues.  But, if you decide to move as an escape, I think you will find that it will not work.  As you know, the house might have something that caused cancer, might have been some combination of food, the microwave, exposure to household cleaners, the list goes on and on.  So moving from the house will not change that.  As for the memories, they will come with you.  First, you will likely take things from your house so you will continue to have the physical reminders.  Second, they are part of your fiber now.  If you are stuck and unable to live life because of the two things, you might seek out some help.  There is nothing wrong with help.  The very core of our beings have been rocked and we all need help from time to time.

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    bravegirl Registered Users
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    Yes, we did move. And we moved by a few thousand miles. This was at the fag end of the LTM..... We know that we'll never know what caused the leukemia. We also knew that the house may or may not have been the reason - we'll never find out. Our move was primarily because of our desire to move closer to the family and to move away from as many things as possible that would remind us of what we've gone through. We were mostly alone in our battle with cancer, except for support we got from grandparents. So, that desire was there as well as the desire to start fresh. There is nobody in my daughter's new school or neighbourhood or my office who knows what she's gone through and that is helping her in her desire to be a normal child. The kids tease her of being fat and that annoys her no end - but it is also motivating her to be more active and loose weight (swimming, dancing, theatre, etc). However, I also know that while we have moved away from the things (like places) that would remind us;  there are number of emotional memories that just would'nt vanish - and we have to deal with it. Even after 1 yr OT, we talk about the treatment pretty often - although not on a daily basis.

     

    So, you are not the only one who has thought about making the move. And you'll not be the only one to execute on it as well.

     

    Good luck,

    Puneet

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    kimmeebee Registered Users
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    I am contemplating moving. We moved to this house a few months after Emma was diagnosed and it does hold a lot of memories, both good and bad. I'm itching for a fresh start and a simpler life now and it's very tempting to downsize into an apartment since it's just me and Emma. 

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    LindseyDY Registered Users
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    We moved, but not because of thinking something was wrong with our house. We were living in Africa, came home when our daughter got sick, found out she had leukemia and we were then unable to go home. After living in friends basement for 5 months we finally bought a new home and moved in there.

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    Carrie&Hannah Registered Users
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    Yes.  We lived right next to a  gas station.  In the time frame we lived there, I found a lump in my boob and Hannah got Leukemia.  I'm not saying that's why, but it was enough to scare me to death.  I still cry thinking, what if where we lived did this to my baby.  

  • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
    skylersmom Registered Users
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    Hi,

    I haven't been on the boards in a bit but had to chime in!  We are going to make a move very soon!  We live in Florida and my daughter was diagnosed in 2008 when she was six years old. She has been OT for a little over a year and is doing well - she just turned 10 and has a sister who just turned 12.  So many bad things have happened since her diagnosis.  We lost our family business and our house (so at least we don't have to sell it).  The only family we had here abandoned us and the last few years have been a nightmare.  The kids already changed schools when we lost our home.  I managed to get a job when our daughter went into LTM and my husband took over treatment and worked side jobs.  He recently lost that work and we have been trying to scrape by on just my small salary.  It is very expensive to live here in South Florida.  We have been here all our lives but LOVE it out West.  We are setting our sights on either New Mexico, Arizona or Nevada.  We want mountains, cooler non-humid air and outdoor activities.  Florida is beautiful but we've had enough of the beaches and way too many memories (good and horrible).  I know you can't run away from this trauma but we tried to start over here and just can't do it.  Our dream is to live out West and we have nothing left here.  The hosptial, our old business/store, our old home, family still near that left us etc... It is all way too much!

     

    Our current lease it up next June and the kids will be out of school so it is the perfect time.  We were gonna do this last year just as our daughter ended treatment but didn't go through with it and now we are doing worse!  It is very scary to make this BIG move with no help but I really feel we all need this.

     

    Anyone from Arizona, Nevada or New Mexico feel free to chime in here!

     

    Hugs,

    Pam

    • Re: Did anyone move during or after treatment?
      tburkhardt Registered Users
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      We live in Las Vegas, Nevada and love it.  We live toward the mountains (Summerlin - Red Rock) about 20 miles away from the strip.  I know some kids at our clinic come from AZ for treatment.  We have a few months of very hot weather, but the rest of the year is gorgeous, especially fall and spring.  If we want to go to the beach, it's only a 5 hour drive to one in CA.  The job market isn't the greatest here right now, but there are lots of foreclosures and great deals on housing.  Good luck and let me know if you have any more questions!  

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